spigot: I CAN'T REALLY SAY WHY I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE MY GIRLFRIEND BUT LET'S LOOK AT THE SITUATION ALPHABETICALLY
spigot: A IS FOR FAT, B IS FOR FAT, C IS FOR FAT
spigot: FLIPPING THROUGH THESE CARDS IT APPEARS D THROUGH Z IS ALSO FOR FAT
pants: I'M BIG-BONED LIKE JUDY BLUME'S BLUBBER OR WHATEVER !!! SOB
