pants: I HAD A DREAM THAT I WAS A STUPID CHARACTER IN A COMIC STRIP
pants: THEN POO SQUIRTED OUT AND THAT WAS NOT A DREAM AND I'M UP AT 8:30 AM WITH THE SHEETS
spigot: I REACH FOR THE BONG ONLY TO REALIZE I AM NOT AT HOME
pants: WHEN I TELL PEOPLE MY STORY I'M GOING TO SUBSTITUTE "UFO" FOR "THE FISTING SLING"
deuce: FUCKING FAIRIES