: PANTS FINDS SHIT IN HIS BEARD
pants: OH WOW MAN
pants: I WONDER HOW LONG THAT'S BEEN GOING ON (CHECKS POCKETS, FINDS ENOUGH CHANGE TO BUY COFFEE, WANDERS AROUND DOWNTOWN FOR A WHILE, MASTURBATES IN THE GREYHOUND RESTROOM EVEN AFTER ASSURING SECURITY I WOULD NOT, RETURNS HOME TO FIND NO MESSAGES)
